Tag / pcos

by adena

Cycle 2: CD 19 – Should I Be Hopeful?

Trying really hard not to get my hopes up. So far this whole TTC with PCOS thing has been brought to you by believing I probably can’t have kids. But I have a feeling (and a tiny hint of data) that this cycle may be different. And, why wouldn’t it be? I get to take my first pregnancy test on my 34th birthday.

Why do I think I might be pregnant? Well, I haven’t had any implementation bleeding yet, but apparently not all women get that. My BBT chart leads me to think this could be the cycle for BFP. It also could just be my body freaking out after being shot up with HCG a week ago and releasing a bunch of eggs. I’ll find out fairly soon.

I’ve read a bit about triphasic charts when you are pregnant… your temp starts low, it goes up after you ovulate, and then, after implementation it goes up again if you have the right amount of progesterone to stay pregnant. Two days ago, which was 6-7 days post ovulation, I had a dip in my temps (down to 97.3) and then it went back up. That’s either a fluke, or a good sign. It seems a little early to be an implementation dip (I triggered on CD 11, which means I likely didn’t ovulate until CD 13 — but with the trigger shot and what I was feeling I wonder if I released a little early. It’s apparently possible 24 hours after trigger but usually around 36.)

So far, my chart looks like this:

CD 11: trigger (9pm)
CD 12 (0 DPO): slight temp rise and strong ov. feels (97.3)
CD 13 (1 DPO): very strong rise (98.0)
CD 14 (2 DPO): remains strong rise (98.1)
CD 15 (3 DPO): possible corpes luteum dip  (97.4)
CD 16 (4 DPO): up again
CD 17 (5 DPO): slight drop
CD 18 (6 DPO): major drop – too early for implantation??? (97.3)
CD 19 (7 DPO): up again
CD 20 (8 DPO): possible triphasic shift (98.3)
CD 21 (9 DPO): tbd
CD 22 (10 DPO): tbd
CD 23 (11 DPO): tbd
CD 24 (12 DPO): tbd
CD 25 (13 DPO): tbd
CD 26 (14 DPO): — * 34th birthday
CD 27 (15 DPO): tbd
CD 28 (16 DPO): tbd

So – I think the CD6 drop was too early to be an implementation dip. The only thing that I think could have happened is that I somehow ovulated before the trigger shot (my follicles seem to grow really fast on Femera, as the doc told me to trigger the next night when I had one at 19 and one at 17) at my CD10 ultrasound.) There was a slight temp rise (from 97.0 baseline to 97.3) on morning of Trigger shot, then the next day it shot up to 98.0, so ovulation happened somewhere in there.)

Right now, all there is to do is wait. I was a little defeatist the other day when my temp dropped so significantly, but it’s a relief to see it bump back up. I’ve hit 98.3 in prior cycles in post ovulation, so it’s not strange for me, but according to temps this cycle it could be the start of the triphasic shift. Or it could be meaningless.

My BBT test times are a bit all over the place this cycle too — so it’s not 100% accurate. And I had one night of horrible sleep. But I’m hoping there’s something to it.

If we get pregnant this cycle, it would be amazing. It would mean not having to worry about spending $30,000-$100,000 on IVF treatments. So – we could buy that new couch we’ve been wanting…  and a crib. 🙂

 

by adena

CD 13, Early Trigger Shot, and the TWW

In two weeks, I’ll know if this cycle amounted to anything other than $1000 in medical bills. I have a strange feeling in my heart this cycle is going to work (no reason other than I will be testing on my birthday and I want that to be my birthday gift) — but I’ve also been reading a lot about the super-high rate of miscarriages amongst women with PCOS and I’m now more concerned about getting pregnant and losing the pregnancy than getting pregnant to begin with.

There’s a little logic behind this. Not much. But my logic is that I seem to be a prime candidate for infertility treatments. Unless I have more tubal issues than we think, my only issue / reason for not getting pregnant, as far as we know thus far, is not ovulating. Well, with the Femera I’m producing 1-2 mature follicles each cycle — and they seem to be releasing properly when using a trigger shot to force ovulation. Assuming nothing else is wrong, we have a 15-20% chance each cycle of conceiving using this method.

Yet, the chances for women with PCOS to miscarry are 30%-50%, or even higher, according to numerous studies. I’m quite concerned that even if I can get pregnant, I won’t be able to stay pregnant. This is all personal hypothesis at this point — my eggs could be of horrible quality, or my tubes could be blocked, or something else could be wrong making it impossible for me to even get pregnant. Or, maybe my body isn’t set up like a typical woman with PCOS and I won’t have any issues with miscarriage.

I just like to plan ahead for these things so I’m emotionally prepared. I’ve been fairly sure my whole life I won’t be able to have children – or it would be very, very hard to get pregnant. So as much as I’m saddened over this, I’ve dealt with it a while ago. But – if I DO get pregnant and then lose the child, it’s going to be a whole new emotional ballgame.

I’ve been reading all of these horrible stories about miscarriage and I just think about how awful it is for all the women who have been through this. It’s actually fairly common, even for perfectly healthy expecting mothers. Most miscarriages happen in the first 12 weeks, but some happen later. I just worry about getting my hopes up — and also, actually I worry about worrying every day that the fetus might not make it to another day… not to mention reading those horrifying stories about miscarrying at work (I can’t even imagine!) Well, here’s to hoping this cycle is my ticket to pregnancy and I won’t have to experience miscarriage. But, I prepare for the worst… and hope for the best.

 

by adena

The Potential Costs of IVF…

Although I’m still hopeful that I’ll get pregnant with less invasive and expensive means, I have to be realistic that we may have to resort to IVF in order to have a kid (or, at least, any faint hope of having a kid.) IVF, i.e., “In-Vitro Fertilization,” is a fairly common practice nowadays. When I tell people that I’m having trouble getting pregnant, everyone  jumps to share with me how they know “so and so” who got pregnant with IVF. Simple.

In many cases, these friends of friends lived in a state where IVF is covered by insurance. They mention their friend had to “pay a lot,” but don’t realize that “a lot” is actually co-pays and deductibles, which is still a lot, but it’s not the a lot a lot that is what IVF costs without any infertility coverage, which is the case for most women/couples in America. (Only Massachusetts, New Jersey, Maryland, Connecticut and Illinois require insurance coverage of IVF — elsewhere it’s up to your company if and what they want to cover, which is usually nothing unless you work for Facebook or Google or a giant bank.)

The average cost of a “fresh cycle” of IVF in the US is $12,000-$16,000. Think that’s a lot of money? That doesn’t include any of the medication required  (that’s an extra $3000-$5000+), or optional add ons, such as embryo biopsy and screening. If you get enough eggs out in round one, they can be frozen (and fertilized), for an annual fee, and then frozen cycles later are a little cheaper, at $3000-$5000+ per cycle, plus medications and the optional costs.

According to AdvancedFertility.com, IVF with preimplantation genetic testing (with meds) and a subsequent frozen embryo transfer usually costs about $17,000 – $25,000 in the US.

For women under 35, there is a 47.5% chance that $25,000 will amount to a child. There’s more than a 50% chance that you won’t get pregnant, and that $25,000 will be out the door, never to be seen again. When you turn 35, your chances of live birth decrease slightly to 39.6%. After you turn 38, those go down much more to 28%.

It’s a strange industry — medical clinics set up to give you hope, but also provide a realism in how you’re throwing substantial money at something that may not work, not to mention that if you do have a kid you really need that money to feed, clothe and shelter it. As a woman gets older, the clock is ticking, and suddenly money seems less important than just giving it all you’ve got to have a child. Maybe it won’t work, and maybe you’ll be $100k poorer for it, but at least you’ll know you tried.

Or, perhaps, you move to a state where they cover a cycle or two of IVF.

by adena

First HCG Shot: How it Felt and the TWW

Last night, I had to – for the first time in my life – self-inject a drug into myself. I realize that diabetics and others have to do this regularly, and it’s not that big of a deal, but I let my fear-of-needles take a hold of me, which led to an hour-or-so panic attack and my poor husband trying to help me calm down, accomplished only by a shot of whiskey and finally getting up the guts to poke my stomach fat with the needle, injecting 1cc of HCG and water mix to “trigger” ovulation.

Admittedly, it wasn’t that painful – the injection itself didn’t hurt (I guess it’s a good thing I have so much fat) and it was only slightly uncomfortable when my husband helped me inject the substance – and then it was over. There was slight soreness at the site of the injection, but mostly I just felt a little dizzy and warm for a few minutes – I’m not sure if that was the medication or me just breathing for the first time in an hour.

The process of setting up the injections wasn’t that hard — we had a vial of water and one of powder, and we had to mix 1cc of water into the powder vial and shake it for 30 seconds, then the mixture was ready to be stabbed injected into my body.

As per doctor’s orders, we are to have TI twice this week, once after the injection and once two days later for the the best chance of insemination. I really wonder if this will work — there are so many variables that have to be right to get pregnant, it’s amazing anyone ever does. Now we enter the “TWW” – two week wait – and see if anything stuck. I don’t expect to get pregnant this cycle, though it could happen.