We thought we were going to have to skip this cycle due to our travel schedule, but a new clinic we’re trying out suggested that I take the birth control pill for two weeks to clear out my system, which pushes off the timeline of everything enough that both I and my man will be back in town in time for ovulation (which is still a requirement for this making babies process.) Phew.

I haven’t been enjoying being on the monophonic birth control pills, but I’m glad it’s only for two weeks. Mostly, I’ve had some stomach issues which may or may not have to do with the pill. I stopped taking the pill years ago because I don’t like the idea of permanently pumping hormones into my body, in case it would mess with my chances of getting pregnant, so being on it in order to get pregnant is kind of ironic.

This cycle I would have preferred not to take the BC pill, since I actually had a clean 35 day cycle previously, which is better than the 45-100 day cycles of my past. But the nurse also mentioned that BC is good to level hormones and clear out my system before the cycle, which sounds good, so I’m pumping my body full of Estrogen and such for a short while. Tonight, I stop taking the pill and then I get to experience a system-emptying bleed for the next week (nothing like timing this perfectly with the first week of my new job, oy… here’s to hoping the cramps are no worse than a normal period.)

Once this happens, I will take Femera for 5 days, like the last cycles. I really only had one clean cycle previously since one was a Femera only with no trigger, not approved by doctor but accidentally administered since I was out of town when I needed to go to my appointment. But, given some people take Femera without monitoring and trigger, I’m counting that as a failed cycle. This time around is cycle #3. Lucky #3.

I believe I ovulated in my last cycle with Femera with no trigger shot based on my BBT tracking. That makes me quite hopeful. This time around will be basically like the first cycle – except I don’t know yet if the first cycle with my two fully-grown follicles was a fluke, or if Femera always works for me (at least to grow the follicles large enough so I can ovulate.)

Another concern, TBD, is if my eggs are of low quality. Apparently with PCOS having a lot of eggs is not an issue, but quality often is. I’m still waiting for the moment (since I’m a pessimist) when I’ll be told all of my eggs are unviable. Until then, though, I should assume that my eggs are ok and the only problem is timing and standard monthly odds.

I did have a test last week that looked at my uterus and my tubes. It mostly looked at my uterus to see if it was a good candidate for IVF (it is) but it also checked if saline pumped in would come out my tubes, to see if there are any blockages. The nurse gave me a kind of mixed explanation of my tube quality. She said – some saline came through, which means at least one is at least a little open… but she also made it sound like the amount of saline that came through was very little, leaving her to believe that there may be tubal issues in one or both of my tubes. The only way to know which one is to do an HSG – and this clinic doesn’t do HSGs. My other clinic does, so I may go back to them for the HSG… or I may change health insurance to Kaiser (another post on this soon) which may cover the HSG fully. It’s concerning that there might be a tubal issue, identified but the $500 test, but in order to identify if it’s really an issue I need another $750 test.

The tests also supposedly push through anything blocking the follicles (if it’s movable) so sometimes people get pregnant after these tests due to that, if nothing else is wrong. Maybe I just had a little piece of dust in my tube and this test will do the trick. Infertility treatment is so weird because every month you’re playing the odds – but you don’t really know for sure what’s wrong in most cases. You just keep going until they figure “well if you didn’t have THAT problem you’d be pregnant by now” and then they move you on to the next treatment. Except every month costs $1000+++ that you’re paying out of pocket…

This month, with the hydrosonogram, bloodwork, monitoring and trigger shot we’ll be paying about $2000. I know kids cost a lot when they’re born, but it sure sucks to be spending down my childcare fund prior to conception. But so goes life. I’m still terrified of going the IVF route, spending $50,000 or more, and still having no child in the end. It’s a real possibility, and it makes me go back and forth on whether IVF is something we should seriously consider. But that’s for another post at another time.

For now, I’m hopeful, sort of, that this cycle will work. We’ve cleaned out my system with the birth control pills, and I’m a fresh slate of baby-making material. I’m having no side effects with the Femera other than ovarian cramping, and I’m feeling good about this cycle. The way the timing works out, if I happen to get pregnant this cycle, I will be finding out on my 34th birthday. I think that would be fabulous. Odds are still very slim, but it could happen.